Liquitex Modeling Paste

Saturday we went for a ride down to Galesburg and the Dick Blick store there was having a sale and various demonstrations.  The one set up was using Liquitex acrylic products.  The guys were doing pieces on vinyl albums, which of course, I thought was a super cool idea.  They were doing abstract stuff, but well, who says you have to paint abstract?

Anyway, after spending about $80 on stuff, I started talking to them about the modeling paste medium that I've seen so many artists use to add texture.  They handed me a little 4" x 4" canvas, the jar of paste (and that is what it reminded me of, the Elmer's paste we used to use in kindergarten), and a palette knife and they told me to play.  Oh I did have fun with that.  It goes on so smooth!

So, vague idea in mind when I saw my first marks were mountain peaks.  Then I remembered a place in northwestern Idaho that I've seen on my drives to and from western Washington.  I remember just being simply awestruck by the beauty and wishing I could live there.  I know it was on my left (south) side when I was driving west on I-90 and I know it was before I reached C'oeur D'Alene.  Mountains, trees, a stunning lake...

I began making marks to represent the trees that framed the lake in my view, the grasses that were just the other side of the guard rail, the super cold looking water, and of course, the mountains beyond.  On Sunday, I covered the whole of it with gesso.  I believe the problems in this painting are due to the icky consistency of the gesso bottle I grabbed.  It is toothpaste thick and is all grainy.  I already had it on the canvas, so I did my best to smooth it out.  I attempted pouring a better brand over top and brushing that out as well, but as you can see...brush marks were left in the gesso and I ended up with some vertical stripes in the texture that I didn't want.

I've watercolored over gesso before and tried to give it a second chance.  I don't like how hard I have to work to saturate the colors.  I do, however, like the process of adding texture and I will have to buy the paste medium next time I head down to Dick Blick.  One of the neatest things I've seen done with this type of medium...and I cannot remember whose blog I saw it on recently (I'm so sorry!), but they added letters/words to pieces using latex paint, I believe it was.  And stencils.  I think this would work in the same way.  I have no stencils but ideas are rattling in my head.

So what did I buy?  I bought a sketchbook to begin anew my art journaling.  It doesn't mean I won't ever pick up one of my started journals and do a page in those, but I wanted a fresh start.  Of course, after technically journaling here, I couldn't think of much to say.  So my first cover page has one teeny paragraph on the top of the page.  I did a small oval shaped painting in the middle that I used an ink pen or two to draw a border around.  Ultimate goal on that page was simply to have a cover page in a bit of an old time style.  The painting itself is watercolor, from my head, a small cabin in the woods with a nearby lake.  Nothing pretty about it and the only good to it is the softness of the colors.

I used a small Raphael watercolor travel kit that I also picked up at Blick on Saturday.  I really like the way these cake colors work.  Much more intensity or maybe the word is "saturation" than I get with the other brand I have.  I also picked up two watercolor brushes, a small package set of 2 charcoal pencils and one white (charcoal?) pencil, a pencil sharpener, 2 white plastic erasers...and I believe that was it.  Oh no...I also bought a small drawing book.  Stupid.  It isn't as though I don't have enough art books on my shelves.

I asked about the Sennelier watercolor paints in the tubes but they order those in when customers want them.  I think that will be my next purchase.  I don't know why I stick with watercolors.  I've had a few decent pieces using them, but the only art I've done and have framed down in the living room are oil pieces.  Still and yet, watercolor is my heart.

Letting it all hang out. (Yikes!)

I promise my next post will have images.  Something to look at other than my usual dreck.  But thoughts are swirling this morning.  For some reason.

Finished reading the latest issue of my Watercolor magazine and admit that one of the articles have spurred my (want to) get up and go.  I say "want to" because you all know what a lazy cow I am and can be.  The article had to do with art journaling.  I've always wanted to do this and have made more than one start.  I always find my own words, if I add them, my own handwriting, if I attempt it on the page, to embarrass myself when I go back and look at the page again.  Usually, the art grows on me, flaws and all, the more I look at it.  One of my favorite pieces I've done in a journal was an attempt at Mona Lisa.  I shared that here with you all.  Why?  Yes, the face itself was slightly off somehow (and if I was looking at it right now, I could tell you exactly where), but it had that look of being painted hundreds of years ago.  Weird since I did it with colored pencil.  But I managed the crackelure...crackelature...cracalure...? look of old and yellowing varnish over the top.  The colors looked right. 

I was reading an artist interview today and was slammed with thoughts.  It seems there is a mystique, a something something that gets added to classically trained artists, those who majored in fine art at the university level.  I don't like that one bit.  So many artists are as good or better than those that have been classically trained.  It comes from natural instinct, practice, practice, practice, and self-teaching.  I detest snobbery in any fashion.  Of course, not everyone feels this way and maybe it is  my own lack of formal art instruction (though I've taken more than one class at the university level) that has me feeling so insecure.

And what about artists whose work is way less impressive than my own, looking like something a 5 year old drew?  The "naïve" class of artists.  Some gain fame and notoriety.  Notoriety implying recognition from bad acts and while not my intention to include "bad" with my own definition of notoriety in this case, it kind of applies...LOL  Anyway, there are those who become famous and their work really, well, sucks.  I saw one such artist's work on Antiques Roadshow, of all things.  Turned out she had been a Chicago naïve artist who had passed away. 

And there are those whose work I think looks worse than my own who are teachers!  May not surprise you but it does me.  LOL  And no, I'm not talking about any of you.

I won my one and only art contest at the age of 6 (first grade).  It was a school-wide contest too.  My one artistic claim to fame.  But I sure hold onto it, even though it is pretty much a rather vague memory these days.  I cannot expect more because I do not enter pieces into any shows.  I know myself well enough to know that I just cannot handle rejection.  Maybe I've had way too much of it in my life but it has a tendency to beat me down and strip away another piece of my fragile sense of ego.  Of self.  Of who I am.  Does this make sense?  One day I hope to overcome this fear, but it would have to be a pretty darned good piece.  I'm quite aware of my own lack.  That said, I still have pieces that I look at and am wowed by.  I really did that?  How come I can't do that all the time?  One of life's mysteries (my life's mysteries, I guess I should say).

I think I'll head down to Dick Blick's HQ store today.  And set myself the task of doing a journal.  Maybe using my cake travel palettes a bit.  I also may drool over Sennelier watercolors.  They are one brand that I just have a good feeling about from seeing ads and colors.  Maybe one day I'll get a set of them.

And if anybody cares what I think, I will say that I would never knowingly purchase a "print" when buying art for my home and personal enjoyment.  It would have to be an original.  I want to own the only one of its kind.  I know many artists sell prints of their work and with good reason.  I just couldn't pay good money for them.  I want UNIQUE! 

And yesterday...this is good...I bought "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn."  I think I read the Readers' Digest condensed version when I was pretty darned young.  I have always been a voracious reader, especially when I was really young.  I'll take a book over a movie any day!  Anyway, I've had it on my mind of late, can't quite remember the story.  So?  I bought a used version from an Amazon seller yesterday.  Cannot wait to get it!  My mom used to yell at me and tell me to "get [my] nose out of that book!"  Now with harp and work and art and fatigue and fibromyalgia...well, sometimes it gets shoved to the end of the line in my life.  Or a book that used to take me a day to read will now take weeks as I pick it up here and there.  It is no wonder why I have a tendency to be a loner and a homebody.  My interests are all pretty solitary ones and make sense if you really know me.  I am way more outgoing than I used to be as a kid and even up into my early 20's.  Still, it is me at heart.

One more thing...Yesterday I watched a movie on TCM called Dark Passages with Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall.  I personally can see what she saw in him.  I think he is adorable and the movie itself was good.  I would recommend it if you ever have an opportunity to see it.  (Apparently this font choice puts the first set of quotation marks backwards.  That bugs me!)

Pep Talk

Loved Rhonda Carpenter's post today; I needed the motivation.  Whether it will get me moving is another story.  Have to work and have a one hour harp lesson tonight because I missed last week.  Inventory reasons.

Still haven't turned in my plant's inventory and the product just isn't to be found.  I overheard some talk yesterday and the product may well be in the wind.

I am so impressed by the sketchers and sketchbook carriers.  Always getting some art done.  Me?  Not so much.  I hate wrecking sketchbooks with my juvenile efforts.  I often get a few pages done and shut down, never opening that book again because I'm embarrassed by myself.  I have to get over that issue.  Sketchbooks are not cheap.

Dick Blick's headquarters store has some demos going on this weekend.  They are about an hour and a half from us and we may drive on down.  I love going to the store anyway and it has been awhile.  Maybe I can find a sketchbook that I can dedicate to juvenile drawing efforts.  Going in knowing they will all turn out that way.

Gosh, I am such a downer, aren't I?

But on the plus side, look at those gorgeous light posts to your left! 

Art Doings

At last, I finished the exam for the last book, "Figure Drawing."  It includes the pitcher I shared earlier (and I did go back in and add his irises) and a tracing that we had to clothe.  I seem to lack motivation for this course these days.  I know that 72 took the wind out of my sails completely and I find myself not really caring that much about what I am turning in.  So not like me but I guess I feel like there is no reason to pour my soul into something she is going to not like.  Makes it super hard to get going.  The second half of this test (the clothed figures) I even redid three times, and yet while I apparently cared enough to go at it again and again, I ultimately only cared enough to please myself with the end result.

A whole lot of introspection for a Monday morning, yes?  Blech.  Should have scanned it so you could see.

Went for a bike ride with Michael last night on our bicycle built for two.  Not in too much pain from it as I expected.  Came home all sweaty though, even though it was overcast outside.  Still, I got off my butt and did something for a change.

I'm in 7th heaven having my harp back up and running. 

Next art book (for the course) is portraits.  Last time I had begun this class and couldn't finish it due to the living in the car situation a few years ago, I did manage to get through portraits.  I did a graphite drawing of Dana Cooper.  I don't think she's talked to me since!  LOL  (Not kidding though.)  Anyway, I will have to get a properly lit photograph taken of Michael.  I don't think he'll hate me if I screw it up.

I'm kind of itching to work on something I want to do because I want to do it though.  Haven't worked up my energy to begin yet, though. 

The Midwest Folk & Fiber Festival is coming up the weekend of June 21 - 23.  I signed up to take a paper making and book-binding course.  It must not be too labor intensive as it is only a 3 hour class.  I've always wanted to know how to do both of these things so I'm rather excited about it.  At least it isn't an inventory weekend.

Speaking of which, I found the product missing from our other plant but I'm going to check one more thing for my plant.  I don't think I'll find it though.  This stuff was due last Thursday but I wasn't given the go ahead by the plant manager to send it in.  A good thing since I found product for the one plant.  And yes, Friday was worse than even I expected.  39 orders were put into the system, 5 of which I deleted and one of which I talked one of the guys through adding into the system at 10:30 p.m. Friday night.  Those poor guys were there from 6 or 7 a.m. up until at least 10:30 p.m. on Friday.  I can't wait until all the construction chaos is over and product is running normally again. 

Friday

And thank God it is.  Work has been hellish this week and today will prove to be more of the same.  I'm the only one available to handle orders and order changes for not one but two plants.  The other plant's CSR is off today as is the plant manager (who is trying to handle two plants...and it is becoming obvious that he is struggling doing so).  I have both plants' inventory finished but my plant's is not where it should be and I cannot find it.  I'm good at finding things too.  Sigh...  I hope it doesn't ultimately reflect on me.

It has been six days of no practicing on the harp but my string finally arrived in the mail yesterday.  I hope to get it installed when I get off the computer so I can practice before work.  Funnily enough, the space at the joints of my first two fingers of my right hand is super swollen and hurts between those bones halfway to my wrist.  I believe it is simply osteoarthritis...maybe playing will ease it?  Who knows.

Last night I simply couldn't sleep for thinking about the second half of my art course exam, the drawing of two people wearing clothes (the point is handling the folds).  I just want to get it finished and I've my mind set to do so this weekend.  I've already been up an hour (it is 4:18 a.m.) and am finding it ridiculous that my internal clock has me getting up this early every day.  No wonder I cannot stay awake much past 8 p.m. most nights.

One show Michael and I have been enjoying is "Best Ink," which is almost a complete copy of "InkMaster."  We love both shows and no matter what anyone thinks of tattoos, I just love the artistry of them.  I guess tattoos have never bothered me because my dad had them and I associate them with strength (don't know why). 

My mind keeps replaying an endless loop of how to reserve whites on masa paper.  I know Leslie White has mentioned wax before but quite honestly, I just don't know if it is feasible.  And I don't have any clear wax, though I am thinking of just getting some white birthday candles (I think their slim size will work for me to try to make sure I don't "color outside the lines.") from the grocery store.  One of the few times I am thinking of re-trying a past failure.  Normally I don't have the patience for repeating a painting (and that is why I still haven't tried weaving a failed painting).

I'm trying to remember when I started blogging...2005?  2006?  2007?  I'm leaning towards 2005 but I don't know for sure.  Been a long time and I'm still not tired of it.  Still using it as a journal too, apparently.

How is one person so out of sorts so much of the time?  Yeesh.  I'm sick of myself.

Crackpot

This is how I see myself.  Old, tired, crabby, weird.  Blah.

Yes, I feel like this kid.

The only art I've done is to add the irises to Scott and start over again on the other half of the exam piece.  And to change the background to better fit my mood.  Obviously I'm a rather moody you know what. 

I'm not so motivated for anything right now.  It is inventory time at work and I always heap stress on myself with that.  I've also popped yet another harp string so haven't been able to practice.  Ordered that whole octave though each string that has popped thus far (this makes the 4th or 5th in the past few weeks) has popped from a different octave.  Of course.  Received a call yesterday that the store was on backorder for that string set.  They did, however, pick up the bill to ship the particular string to me and we should have it by Wednesday.  Which means I'll have gone 4 days without practicing prior to my lesson.  They are also shipping a string of lesser quality than I ordered. 

Yesterday I was asked if I had pinkeye, which I don't believe I do.  That said, it felt like something was in that eye all day yesterday and I couldn't leave it alone.  Super itchy and still feeling that way today.  Allergies, mayhaps?

Sometimes too I get so discouraged just visiting blogs and seeing just how much I lack in talent and motivation.  So what makes me happy?

My kids.  My grandkids.  But they have their own lives, you know?

Reading, sleeping, watching tv.  Yes, I'm an exciting live wire.  All the things I've always loved to do (art, creating with yarn or threads...) I just don't have the energy for these days.  Also, I know I'm feeling depression with the whole house on the market process.  We have had zero interest except in the first couple of days.  I think this old house funky smell and the sight of how much updating it needs is a turnoff.  I know it is for me.  We bought it because we were threatened with being sued if we bailed on the house.  We had been doing rent to own and while I could and still do see the possibilities of the place, it is just way too much work and money. 

Michael tunes out my whining and complaining so feel free to do so too.  I try not to let it get the upper hand but today is not one of those days.

Oh...IHOP has apparently added the red velvet pancakes into their permanent line up.  When we went last Sunday morning, we were greeted with new menus and these yummy pancakes were back in the rotation and apparently for good - at least for now.  So?  While I might be currently craving an omelette, I did have the red velvet pancakes and bacon on Sunday.  Sans the whip cream and icing they put on top.  I prefer mine with syrup.

Today is Thursday...

Sometimes I lose an extra day on holiday weeks and think it is one day later than it is.  I find that weird because most people would think it is the day before it actually is because of the extra day off of work.  Anyway, I've not lost a day this week.  Wish it was Friday though.

Our new furniture arrived at work and leave it to me to put a brand new chip in the freshly painted walls.  Anyway, I'm all moved into my new digs but still need to move files.  Those will be a pain because I need get all new hanging files (legal size) so need to put in an order today. 

I should never underestimate what the fibromyalgia does to me.  I have a tendency to do just that though.  I was in so much pain last night that it took me a long while to fall asleep.  I debated taking some aspirin but in the end, decided to forego them.  All I did was a bit of picking up and putting down of the boss' junk. 

Do you know that I just now noticed that I don't have irises in the ball player.  Poor Scott.  Hope I can add them in as I sprayed a matte finish spray on the piece so the pencil wouldn't smear.  Still haven't begun clothing the other two figures that are due for this test.

Saturday will be an IHOP day with my daughters and all my grandkids.  I so look forward to that.  I've been trying to watch what I eat better but that will be moot when I go to IHOP.  I don't know if it will be pancakes or an omelette.  I've been on an omelette kick for the past couple of months.

We had three, maybe four showings on the house last week, the first week it was listed.  Nothing at all this week.  What a disappointment that is for me.  I let things like this really get me down.  Couple it with the continual fretting and worrying I do and I admit that for the first time in a super long time I'm feeling rather depressed.  No worries though.  I don't get depressed too often.  This too shall pass.

I've popped the third harp string in a month.  Cost me a day of practicing too.  Now we have a big loud old (yes, all those adjectives and no commas because that is how I'm thinking of it) dehumidifier up in my studio.  Sigh...throw in the window a/c unit and you can imagine how I'm looking forward to practicing this a.m.  And $30 for one harp string!  I'm going to have to start buying octaves to keep them on hand.

By the way, if you are interested, this is my harp teacher, Nichole:  http://www.harpmelodies.com/
She took harp lessons for 19 years, plays for two symphonies (Peoria and DuPage), teaches piano as well and is married to a musician (guitar) herself.  Her pedal harp was her graduation present to herself.  She usually has it and a smaller Troubador (Lyon & Healy) in her class room.  My harp is between the Troubador and the concert pedal harps size-wise.  My harp is a lever harp.  Due to the price of pedal harps, I cannot say I'll ever graduate to one.  Michael thinks it is a possibility and that I have 5 years in which I can trade my harp in for full price paid on a new or used pedal harp.  We'll see.  I'm kind of old to invest that kind of money and unless I get better at it, it isn't going to happen.

My lesson went pretty well last night and I had the audacity to ask my instructor how/why musicians get so into classical music (picture them eyes closed and swaying with the music).  I've heard beautiful classic music and I can't say I dislike it.  But I also can't say that I really "get into it."  She told me that as your knowledge of music grows you begin to understand the unique passages and the true genius and beauty of each piece.  We spoke of music history and I really enjoyed it.  I hope I one day get to that stage.  I just recently ordered 3 harp music CDs from Amazon and I can't wait to listen to them.  If I ever manage to master any one piece, I'll definitely tape it for you.  Right now I'm afraid it would be one of those things that make you slap your hands over your ears.  Anyway, she suggested that I might enjoy a music history class.  I think she is right and I'm going to look into that. 

I guess I'm done blathering.  I'm debating bringing in a piece of art for my "office" space.  I don't know yet though.  I need a nice tray, a plant (probably silk since I can't keep anything alive these days)...I'm thinking paisley.  Wonder if I can find something?  The furniture is espresso colored, the walls a slightly blue green color.  Heavy on the green (I'm in 7th heaven with the color).  Ok...now I really am done.